How to Make Friends in a New Country: A Migrant's Journey to Belonging in the UK

Leaving Home: My Journey from Nigeria to the UK

In 2018, I left Nigeria for the UK. Since then, I’ve only returned once, in seven years.

On that single visit, I felt like a stranger in my homeland. Yet in the country where I now live, I will never be truly “welcome.” I will always be a migrant — hovering between two worlds, never fully belonging to either.

At least once a week, someone asks, “Where are you from?” And every time, I hesitate.

Should I say Nigeria - my country of birth, where I no longer feel completely connected? Or should I say England - more specifically East London, where I’ve lived, worked, and grown, even though my accent sounds neither fully Nigerian nor 'British'?

Such is the dilemma of being a Naija Girl Abroad.

Staying Connected with Family Back Home

Today is the 5th October, my brother’s birthday, and I can’t be there to celebrate with him.

Instead, I’ve sent a “Happy Birthday” text — and later, we’ll have a video call, thanks to technology (and Instagram). I’ve also sent him a small monetary gift through LEMFI, the kind that says, I’m far away, but I haven’t forgotten your birthday.

A few days ago, one of my friends back in Nigeria also had her birthday. The same routine followed — a text, a video call, a little money sent across borders.

This is how we immigrants stay connected to home; through screens, signals or the lack therof, and the occasional trip that feels more like tourism than return.

Finding Friends as an Immigrant in the UK

Seven years in England, and only now has it started to feel like home.

I didn’t make many lasting friendships at university, but over time, life introduced me to some truly wonderful people.

I met Amirah through an Instagram follow and a spontaneous DM. Through her, I met Hafsah — the birthday girl in the photo above, and from there, the love has grown bigger, the circle has grown.

Yesterday, at my friend's birthday party (in her London flat), we laughed, danced, and talked late into the night. For a moment, it felt like we were kids again, all worries non-existent for a few hours, no accents to explain, no questions about “where we’re really from.”Just friends. Just joy. Just home.

Building a Sense of Belonging in a New Country

It takes courage to build a new life thousands of miles away from everything familiar. But in that courage, there’s also growth.

Now, I have new friends, new memories, new adventures, and, finally, a new sense of belonging.

The journey of immigration is full of woes and wonders, the ache of missing home, and the beauty of creating one from scratch.

Pro Tip: How to Make Friends Abroad

If you’re a new immigrant in the UK or anywhere in the world — don’t be afraid to make new friends online. Follow people who inspire you, send that DM, get out of bed and join communities, or try apps like Bumble BFF where I have made some incredible friends too.

You could be one click away from a lifelong friendship.

Because sometimes, home isn’t a place you find. It’s a feeling you build, one moment at a time.